senseless thoughts

tila hihina rin ang ulan, tila lilipas din ang bagyo. liliwana din ang kalangitan at ang araw ay sisikat nang muli…

rainbows. rainbows. RAINBOWS where you at?

and just like how i guessed it. i really need to drop somethings off in the form of water droplets.

walang tigil ang ulan at nasaan ka araw?!

i’m tired. dead tired of everything. i can’t feel anything anymore.

#laslaspulsorant

• everything is negative- i can’t seem to find the bright side of anything.
• even the movie that i’m watching pisses me off- kahit na hindi ko naman nararamdaman yung nararamdaman nung character (does that make sense?)
• i wanted to be alone in my own world- door locked, no texting anybody, no chatting, no contact with anyone
• i try all the possible sleeping position- at finally pabaliktad ang nakasatisfy nun (facing the sun in the morning yeah! which i really hate)
• i’m still awake at this hour thinking about what gone wrong?- and overthinking ‘till migrane attacks
• i’m writing…just like now.

EPIPHANY, where thou art?!

thank you E for boosting up my self-esteem. you don’t know how much i needed them this time. i feel like i sucked my whole life. damn it! :/

it is during summer that i have the most heart aches to mend. i think because it is during summer that i am not preoccupied by things. it’s the time of the year where i get to catch up on things that i set aside for the last ten months. it’s the time where i get to assess things. and the time where i realize how big the changes are. then i think of how that happened? how did i let that happen?

then i came to realize that those are meant to happen just because. during summer is where i came to realize how much i took for granted things and how others took me for granted but still think that it’s just normal. it’s still fine. it will still work. but as i see it now most of them won’t work anymore. some of them will stop progressing and hopefully not stop just right there.

8 summers ago was the first summer that i EVER felt this way. too much thinking sucks. it will lead you to broken roads and shattered hearts.

but also during summer where i came to think how i’m lacking in everything that has gone wrong. may it be on friendship, sisterhood, etc. then i’ll start changing after. but it can be for the better or for what i think is right.

i’m still on the process of thinking about things to let go of or to hold on to. some i would really want but some i would just let go.

it’s just the same in decluttering your closet or room. you’ll just weed those that can’t be use. even those that has sentimental values because it doesn’t make sense anymore. maybe before but somethings are just there for just a short moment and some are for a lifetime. i just hope i’d still be able to keep that once i said for a lifetime with me. and i hope it’ll stay for a lifetime.

to the AWESOMEST FRIEND and ATE i know…

i may not be with you on this special day but know that i LOVE YOU and dane. you’re the awesomest friend i know. tulad ng sabi ko sa’yo i’m glad that i met you. wait, nasabi ko na ba yun sa’yo? lol. pero I AM BEYOND GRATEFUL THAT SOMEONE LIKE YOU BECAME PART OF MY LIFE. sobrang cheesy pero MAHAL KITA ATE JEN! :* at dahil dyan may iba pa kong gift xD

plus

lagyan na natin ng ganto…

I LOVE YOU! :*

hindi ba pwedeng kayo na lang dalawa maghabulan para all is fair? torn